I take myself to my own psychological edge through my work. I call it,’ touching the wire’. I hope by using art to go close to trauma I can see it, identify it, name it and maybe transform it.
The processes can be triggering. I wanted to lay down and go to sleep.
Processing trauma through glass work.
In the hot shop with Master Glass artist Bailey Shooter, I wrote acts of abuse and humiliation onto bits of paper. They were thrown into a blown glass bowl and caught fire instantly turning to ash. Another molten blown bowl was placed inside shattering the first and sealing the ash between two layers of glass. The lump was fired again and a phallic form moulded with firing, pressing and gouging. I took the vitriol, the rage, the denigration and set it on fire, fused it like a whisper in glass and had a trophy made. The original objects causing injury and harm transformed into something quite different. Im not sure if it was the ‘right’ form. I’m not sure I can separate abuse from pleasure. The process took my breath away.
Maybe it’s at least an object that stands autonomously and the object made is quite benign, the remnants of ash leak slightly from the top. It would be naive to think this process stops here.
I feel… I’m not just making this work for me.